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Subject: Women-in-Hockey Digest V1 #644
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Women-in-Hockey Digest Monday, April 3 2000 Volume 01 : Number 644
In this issue:
Re: "Program For Girls" hockey Camp
Re: "embarrassment and lack of confidence" -- help wanted
Finland 4, Russia 0 (after first period)
Teams in Des Moines
Re: "embarrassment and lack of confidence" -- help wanted
Re: "embarrassment and lack of confidence" -- help wanted
embarrassing moments
WWC Results so Far
I Hope They're Not All Blowouts
3-0 Canada
re-dosn't want to make a mistake
More Scores
Re: re-dosn't want to make a mistake
Re: embarrassing moments
Final Scores
Re: "embarrassment and lack of confidence" -- help wanted
USA vs. Germany (Summary)
Canada/Japan Report
Re: embarrassing moments
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Date: Mon, 3 Apr 2000 14:39:57 EDT
From: email@hidden
Subject: Re: "Program For Girls" hockey Camp
Does anyone on the list know anything about this camp "supposedly" occurring
July 10-14 at Johnny's Ice House in Chicago? Several St. Louis Force girls
sent in deposit checks and have heard no reply. The ph. # doesn't work and
their website says "under construction".
Here's who they list in the brochure as on the staff: Ben Smith, Julie
Sasner, Mark Yannetti, Mark Bavis, Katey Stone, Judy Parish, A.J. Melscko and
Bob Dereany.
It says the Director of the camp is Steve Cedorchuk, USA Women's Select
Coach. Johnny's Ice House has brochures but the rink director doesn't know
anything about it.
We're thinking this is a scam! Any info would be appreciated!!
Debbie #49's Mom
------------------------------
Date: Mon, 3 Apr 2000 15:40:27 -0400
From: Debbie Minden
Subject: Re: "embarrassment and lack of confidence" -- help wanted
It all goes to show you that everyone has a different experience. My 13
year old daughter only cried when I didn't let her play. She started at
mini-mite, and went up through the ranks with the boys. Sometimes there
was another girl on the team, usually not. Through Squirt and PeeWee, she
was either captain or assistant captain. On Bantam, she had some trouble
with the boys early on. Her 18 year old sister taught her some interesting
comments, and they stopped. The kid who ragged her the most was the one
who had the biggest crush on her. Once she was hit hard, and came limping
off the ice. The team clown yelled, "Hey Jess, did he get you in the
balls?"
Jess has learned that you do your best, and if you don't like how you
played that day, you try harder and different the next time out. When I
say ,'I think you did ok', I think she hears it as I love you. That is the
only encouragement I can give. (Except for the millions of sticks I buy
every year.)
I think the thing to remember is that all kids are different and it is
really important to listen to their bodies, voices, habit changes, etc. It
is hard to draw the line between what they want and gently encouraging
them, and what we think they want and need, and showing them the REAL
truth. I have seen too many kids pushed and prodded right off the ice, out
of ball fields, and off the track by parents who have yet to learn to take
that important step back and let the child discover his/her own talents and
needs.
Debbie
------------------------------
Date: Mon, 3 Apr 2000 13:50:03 -0700
From: "Phil Cottrell"
Subject: Finland 4, Russia 0 (after first period)
Finland is walloping Russia 4-0 after one. Shots 16-3 in favour of Finland.
Phil
------------------------------
Date: Mon, 3 Apr 2000 14:39:02 -0700 (PDT)
From: Jenn Nejedlo
Subject: Teams in Des Moines
A friend of mine is getting transferred to Des Moines. She's got a
few years of hockey under he belt, so she can play at most levels.
Are there any teams out there that she might be able to join?
Thanks,
Jenn
__________________________________________________
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------------------------------
Date: Mon, 3 Apr 2000 18:16:41 EDT
From: email@hidden
Subject: Re: "embarrassment and lack of confidence" -- help wanted
Maybe have some of the kids on the team that you know well go up and ask her
to skate with them. If she hears it from them maybe she will have the
confidence to move with them.
Try to tell her that she already fears the worst will happen, and the worst
senario is that they do make fun of her(which could or could not happen). If
she knows it might happen than maybe it won't be as bad. I don't know if that
just made any sense.
Finally mistakes means that she is trying. A coach said once in practice, "If
you don't fall than you are not trying hard enough."
I know all of this is hard to convince a 7 year old about, but keep
encouraging her to try, and if she really doesn't want to do it after several
weeks or a season than so be it(make the trial period more than one or two
practices.
As the Great One said, " 100% of the shots you don't take won't go in."
------------------------------
Date: Mon, 3 Apr 2000 18:50:43 EDT
From: email@hidden
Subject: Re: "embarrassment and lack of confidence" -- help wanted
I'm 17, played some roller hockey with mostly guys. Drained the
confidence. Started ice hockey (womens) and it definetly grew, I wasn't
worried as much abotu mistakes as I was around the high school guys.
Then I tried out for the womens competitive team, and pretty much bombed
tryouts, I'm not too great of a player in the first place, but I completly
blew tryouts. I made a mistake and got frusterated, and tryouts went downhill
from there. I skated on the practice squad for the first half of the season,
worrying about making mistakes and wondering if I could make the team later
in the season. I of course made mistakes left and right, getting frusterated
by them, and making even more mistakes. And by letting them get to me, I
think the coaches and several teammates got frusterated with me.
I started playing in another co-ed league (adult) because I just couldn't
practice without having something to put it into. I ended up being one of the
better players on the team, but we had no teamwork whatsoever. I played up,
and the guys would ask me what to do, which was a great confidence builder.
And then 2 guys that were really good joined the team, making me look not to
good, and eventually I faded away in the talent pool of the team, one game I
ended up hitting/kicking the puck into my own net, totally stupid play, I was
facing the complete opposite direction I should have been. So then my
confidence dropped again. But while sitting on the bench watching, I realized
that some of the guys made mistakes routinely, and I didn't feel so bad. That
feeling just never seemed to crossover to practices with the womens team.
Then there were the girls dropin/clinic things (just last month
actually). The guy who was running them kept emphasizing that none of us were
the best, even him. (of course he could've beaten us all by himself, 10-0
with one hand tied behind his back) and that we all made mistakes, and you
can't learn without them. And sure I'd heard that a million times before, but
it never really sunk in. So with like a month left of practice with the
womens team, I finally get my act together, laughing off mistakes, and
actually having fun again.
So basically, I would tell her, that everyone does make mistakes, even
Cammi Granato or maybe one of her role-models. And that you can't learn
without them. Yes, stereotypical, but maybe it will sink in. Maybe she could
watch a game, older kids, women or something, and watch for their mistakes. I
know I always get a laugh, and feel more better about myself, when I see some
pro ref or player fall out of nowhere or completly whiff on the puck.
>Maybe have some of the kids on the team that you know well go up and ask her
>to skate with them. If she hears it from them maybe she will have the
confidence to >move with them.
Just make sure the kid you have ask, really does want her to skate up,
Because if he didn't, and she finds out he didn't mean it, there could be a
slight problem on your hands.
And another Gretzky quote, which I have seemed to keep repeating in my head,
and somehow it keeps me going: "Do it because you love it, everything else
will fall into place."
I figure, I love the game so much, and sure maybe I'm not playing as well
as I would like to, and I'll make a lot of mistakes along the way. But
someday, maybe in time for tryouts next fall, or even 10 years from now,
things will start coming together.
And either way, the only thing that really matters, is if she's having fun.
I've debated quitting several times recently. So far, I've been able to boost
the confidence back up, and have fun.
Jennie
------------------------------
Date: Mon, 3 Apr 2000 19:06:19 EDT
From: email@hidden
Subject: embarrassing moments
While writing the last, neverending e-mail. I started thinking about some
of my embarrassing moments, and thought hearing about other people's bonehead
moves would help with the whole confidence issue. And if not, maybe its good
for a few laughs.
I've had mostly the classic embarrassing hockey moments. Leaving the
skate guards on, putting the puck in my own net, falling out of nowhere.
And then there was the championship roller hockey game. I was going out
for a shift, through the door (boards are really high at that rink) and my
jersey got caught on the door. I about fell on my face, and after recovering
tried to go out again, falling again, and somehow eventually making it onto
the rink.
Also, when I first started ice hockey (probably another classic) I had a
problem with making it over the boards. I fell, and after landing, I couldn't
help but sit there and laugh. A teammate brought it up before the next game,
telling me to not do it again. But I did, this time it was in slow motion,
and I was laughing the whole way down. Another teammate of course thought I
was crazy, but I mean, how could I not laugh. 3 others teammates ended up
falling off the boards throughout the season, all laughing as we did went
down.
I also have the incredible ability to fall for no reason, any time I
happen to be on the ice. I'll be standing there, in line, and all of the
sudden, wham, I'm on the ground. Or I'll be bored, and spinning around (my
latest entertainment during breaks) and fall flat on my face. Definetly gives
some teammates a good laugh.
Just thought I'd share.
Jennie
------------------------------
Date: Mon, 3 Apr 2000 16:31:47 -0700
From: "Phil Cottrell"
Subject: WWC Results so Far
Finland 7, Russia 1 (F)
USA leads Germany 1-0 in the first period.
Canada vs. Japan starts in a few minutes.
Phil
------------------------------
Date: Mon, 3 Apr 2000 17:22:14 -0700
From: "Phil Cottrell"
Subject: I Hope They're Not All Blowouts
Well, with Finland beating Russia by 6 goals, the USA 4 up on Germany at the
first intermission and Canada taking all of 1:01 to get ahead of Japan
(Pounder from Wickenheiser) it looks like the "also rans" are going to take
a beating again.
Every year we hope that the weaker teams have improved their standard. We
may have to wait until next year for that...
Phil
------------------------------
Date: Mon, 3 Apr 2000 17:28:33 -0700
From: "Phil Cottrell"
Subject: 3-0 Canada
And not even 10 minutes in yet. Kellar has added two, after Pounder's
opener. And we're now on the power play...
Phil
------------------------------
Date: Mon, 3 Apr 2000 22:33:47 -0300 (ADT)
From: unknown
Subject: re-dosn't want to make a mistake
Hi
I am a mom of a nine year old girl. I have experienced the same situation
as you. One day at the rink for a practice I was sitting with all the
parents. Being new to the team they didn't know who I was and really I
didn't know who many of the parents were. Then one of the moms said I
really enjoy that girl out skating the boys and blow bying them during the
skating drills. This made me feeling so pride that my daughter only then
eight could do such a thing. I really never noticed untill it was pointed
out.(duh!!) During provincials her team placed 4th out what I that was a
millions of teams. They played hard and as a team, I that they did
exceptionally well. On the way home she cried all the way because she was
the only player to get a high sticking penalty. Other then hers there were
no other penaltied on the team. They seem to put much so pressure on
themselves and don't want to make any mistakes or dissapoint anybody.
My daughter's problem is that I play in a competitive womens hockey league
in Nova Scotia and she doesn't want to dissappoint me. I have also told
her to play her best and that is all we can ask, and have fun!!(I think
the most important). But she still feels she has to do no wrong. I have
asked why she feels this way and she says she doesn't know but she does.Like y
our situation hopefully it is only a growing or maturing thing. I also
hope if she no longer likes to play she won't but a player with talent who
only stops playing because they think they should and will only
dissappoint people is a shame. Our daughter has not said if she will play
next year, I hope she will because she is a good player with talent but
this is a decision she has to decide.
From one mom to another
------------------------------
Date: Mon, 3 Apr 2000 18:57:37 -0700
From: "Phil Cottrell"
Subject: More Scores
5-0 Canada over Japan in the third.
16-1 (!) USA over Germany, final.
For some reason, no score yet reported on Sweden/China.
Follow along at:
http://www.iihf.net/9900/WWSA.asp?qsLayout=45
Phil
------------------------------
Date: Mon, 3 Apr 2000 22:18:10 -0400
From: Debbie Minden
Subject: Re: re-dosn't want to make a mistake
This perfectionist trend is a girl thing. It is also part of what makes
our girls into anorexics and suicides. The pressure really consumes some
of these kids, and it is our job as parents, coaches, and educators to make
sure we try to alleviate this pressure. The kind of kid who will be truly
damaged by pressure is the kind who will achieve without it. It is hard to
step back, but we have to. If a kid is having fun at a sport, they don't
need to be encouraged to do more.
Debbie
------------------------------
Date: Mon, 3 Apr 2000 22:44:31 EDT
From: email@hidden
Subject: Re: embarrassing moments
Hey, Jennie, good topic!
I love hearing other peoples' stories of their experiences with the game.
My personal most embarrassing moment happened in a Juniors game
where my sister and I were the only girls in the league. I was playing
defense in midseason game. Our team had been slumping and this
particular game was pretty rough; we trailing by 5 or 6 goals in the last
period of play. I had just had a pretty awful shift, allowing a couple of
back to back goals and I was skating off the ice in a dejected mood
with my head down and my stick parallel to the ice. I was skating
pretty fast, but I was so upset that I didn't slow down much and I forgot
to lift my stick over the boards. As I hit the bench my stick slammed
across the open door with a crash. Unfortunately, I didn't stop; when
my stick hit I vaulted over it and landed on the ground a few feet away,
stunned. Most of the guys on the bench started laughing hilariously
and a team dad came running over to see if I was okay. I was only
shaken up, but my pride was wounded far worse. That was the last
time I was caught skating with my head down in a long time!
Annie Swanson
Water City Sirens
------------------------------
Date: Mon, 3 Apr 2000 20:42:02 -0700
From: "Phil Cottrell"
Subject: Final Scores
Canada 9, Japan 0
Sweden 1, China 1
Phil
------------------------------
Date: Mon, 03 Apr 2000 20:41:18 -0700
From: Anne Paulson
Subject: Re: "embarrassment and lack of confidence" -- help wanted
At 10:51 AM 4/3/00 -0400, Heidi Kay wrote:
>
>
>So we asked her if she wanted (practice with them, while still staying on
>the in-house team as well, with Dad and her brother) and HUGE TEARS
>ensued. After an hour of trying to decipher what on earth was upsetting
>her so, we have finally figured out what is going on in her pretty little
>head.
>
>She is AFRAID of making mistakes. She doesn't want to move up (to offense
>or to the mite travel team, because if she makes a mistake the boys will
>tease her and tell her she doesn't belong because she is a girl. Somehow
>she thinks that she is not worthy to be there, and that she has to be
>"perfect" or she is going to be told she doesn't belong.
It sounds to me like your daughter is a perfectionist. I know mothers who
have daughters (and sons, but seemingly less frequently) who are like this.
What works in some cases for these little kids is to back off all
pressure, and let them find out for themselves that they can succeed.
Rachel is only six years old! She has plenty of time for hockey. It could
be good for her to stay in her low-pressure house league and shine.
It's funny that little kids think that defense is the low-pressure
position, and offense the high-pressure. I used to play wing, and now I
play defense; I like defense better, but I feel much more pressure there.
One mistake, and the player is in alone on your goalie.
- --Anne Paulson
email@hidden
------------------------------
Date: Mon, 3 Apr 2000 21:50:50 -0700
From: "Phil Cottrell"
Subject: USA vs. Germany (Summary)
From the USA Hockey site:
http://www.usahockey.com/natteams/women/040300germany.htm
Phil, Victoria, BC
------------------------------
Date: Mon, 3 Apr 2000 21:54:37 -0700
From: "Phil Cottrell"
Subject: Canada/Japan Report
From the Canoe site:
http://www.canoe.ca/HockeyWomen2000Worlds/apr3_can.html
Phil
------------------------------
Date: Tue, 4 Apr 2000 01:56:25 EDT
From: email@hidden
Subject: Re: embarrassing moments
embarassing moment: Just a couple of weeks ago this happened to me. As one
of only about 5 women that play with dozens of guys in a small rec. league I
am used to the guys dressing in front of me out in the lobby (we play at a
rec. center..no dressing rooms and the guys restroom in very small) I
usually go change in the ladies room, even when just changing jerseys after
we divide teams. Well this one night one of the other women and I were having
a converstation (*) and just changed our jerseys out in the lobby with the
guys. One guy kind of looked at me funny and I thought - "grow up, they're
just boobs!" and we went out to play. About an hour and a half later I was
sitting on the bench and felt something poking me...I suddenly realized I
didn't have on my usual sport bra...but a white lacy underwire one...opps!
At that point I felt my face turn red, though of course only I knew why!!
BTW:*My friend and I were discussing the need for 'testosterone patches' so
we could play more 'grrrr' against the guys...we were just worried about the
facial hair! (just kidding folks!)
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End of Women-in-Hockey Digest V1 #644
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